The segregation of women and the fight ahead

Since the beginning of time, women have been socialized to consider other women their enemy.  There are some women who believe a woman can be her strongest ally and confidant and therefore see all women that way.  But this is not the case for the majority of women in this country.  We see this depicted in movies, hear it in music, see its acceptance in our neighborhoods; we watch as it develops in our schools, churches, and businesses.  Then add divisions by race, religion, ethnicity, culture and politics and it becomes a society of women of a few instead of an entire society of women.  This long-term practice of isolating women from each other has helped to create a society that would allow a man like Donald Trump to be elected as the President of the United States.

I believe we have always known this construct existed, whether it was in our sub-conscious or we were fully cognizant of it.  We didn’t create any of the situations that allowed for the segregation of women, but we fully participated in its use to control us.  And whether we knew or not, participated or not, we let it get so bad that many women began to deny what they saw happening to our sisters.  They either turned their heads and said nothing or they allowed themselves to rationalize away the violations inflicted upon women.  The violations ranged from media created to depict women always in conflict, to women making less money than a man for the same job, to the institutionalized condonation of assault against women.  When an entire society, including women, contribute to this thought process, some women begin to believe it.  The outcome of the elections should not be a surprise to anyone.  These women did what they have always done; they ran instead of fought.

All this socialization is hard to overcome without some intervention.  Many of the women who have this mindset will never receive that intervention either because of narrow mindedness or dogmatism.  So, we have a group of women who believe they are not a part of women as a whole.  When a man comes along and shows them the misogynist he is, it was easy for many of these women to believe he was talking about the other women (us).   They failed and still fail, to understand, they are us.  The vagina, that scares so many and gives life to all, is the one and only thing that will NEVER allow a woman to align with these men.  This is a hard concept to accept when all you want is for your world to be ok.  These women want there to be a difference so they don’t have to get involved and fight.  These women don’t want to be the agitator men claim we are.  These women don’t want to be seen as us.

Regardless of everything written above, we cannot abandon them.  We need them as much as they need us, even if they don’t know it.  I believe all of ‘us’ know, that if all women became a cohesive unit, we would take over the world.  And men fucking know it.  It’s the reason they’ve been trying to keep us apart and we allowed it because of our insecurites, our need to please and our training to not speak for ourselves.  We have been a divided queendom for a very long time.  Someone mentioned to me the other day that because so many White women aligned themselves with that woman hater and his cronies, Black women should be fighting for Black women, Latina women should be fighting for Latina women, etc., etc. before helping any other woman.   I told them, normally I would agree with that, but we no longer have the luxury of doing that.  At this point in the history of women, with the elected officials we have, we all have to stand together to ensure our future.  It means that the issues that were ignored before (the issues of Black, Hispanic, Native American, Muslim, Asian and any other marginalized sisters) need to be heard, considered and added to the needs of the majority.  It means that there can be no offense taken at things that make us uncomfortable.  It means White women are going to have to put aside their automatic defense of their privilege.  And it means those of us who were not heard before will have to have patience with those who now need to listen and learn.   It is the only way we can fight for ourselves and for those who left us to fight.


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. dweezer19
    Jan 19, 2017 @ 06:32:12

    I always get burned when I am too eager to make friends with other women. I think a lot of it has to do with my unwillingness to put myself into an “us against them” mindset towards men. I know the differences, have been married for many years and have had many struggles with core differences between the male and female psyche and ego. But breaking into groups that either vilainize or worship, or worse yet-a combination of the two-is not the wisest way to create change. I am very happy to say that I have found a man who serves as my dearest friend but I still long for that female to female trust and understanding that comes from the soul. I have a small group of such friends, but on the whole, I don’t “mesh” well with the female mindset. Thanks for a very insightful pist!


    • Cynt
      Jan 19, 2017 @ 23:58:02

      Dweezer, you are absolutely correct. I want all women to understand that being against men is not going to make any situation we are in better. Men are irrelevant; not because they don’t matter or lack importance, but because they are not the problem. It is human nature for most people to find someone else to blame instead of looking inside. Men may have helped to create the division between women, but women made choices to be a part of it.
      I have had the same problem you mention in your comment. I have very few female friends and don’t find it easy to make friends with females for the reasons you mention. We are both fine with the small group of friends we have until the rest of our sisters catch up.
      Thank you for stopping by and commenting.


      • dweezer19
        Jan 20, 2017 @ 06:17:17

        Thank you. Sometimes I feel so aline in my siutation. Honestly, this “divide” is what promotef my idea for my novel. If you ever want to read any of it, the chapters are all on the blog under Forever Never/The Dawn of Illusion. I truly feel that our human search for our “other half” began long before this existence began. Thanks agian for your post and encouraging words. We are all a work in progress-a divine project. Let us not fail! 💕

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Sneha Dadachanji

A Taste For Poetry.

Dragons Codex

A journey through life

The Wellbeing Blogger

A place to support positive, introvert, and creative people on their journey towards happiness and wellbeing

tonysbologna : Honest. Satirical. Observations.

Honest. Satirical. Observations.

ZenG Yoga

Everyday Living Well, Zen Gangsta Style

%d bloggers like this: